THIS REALLY SUCKS (OR NOT)!

When I sold the house and moved to an apartment in New Jersey, my collie and one of the cats came with me. The apartment was in a brand new complex, and I had to put area rugs down over the hard wood floors. The cat was satisfied with her perch on the top of the couch, but my dog began shedding like crazy all over. The small hand vacuum was put to the test taking care of bags full of dog hair that were gathered up daily. It was summer, and central New Jersey was HOT. The dog was really uncomfortable in the heat, but I had no idea how to operate the air conditioner that was in the wall. I left windows open when I went to work, but since they did not open on opposite sides of the rooms, no air moved through, and we all were hot!

By the end of the summer I had begun looking at other places that would be cooler. Ultimately I ended up getting married and moving with my husband's job to northern New Jersey. This brought with it new shag carpets and new vacuum cleaners. As the children came along, we started referring to the machines as "Bowser" and "Little Yipyip". They effectively removed the cat fur and dog hair as well as small toys and baby socks that were in their path. They were canister-style and I pulled them along easily. They allegedly moved "over the floor on air", and the cords would retract if I only pulled on them gently. Basically that feature worked. We relied on them up to the point when we had an above-ground swimming pool installed. The workmen needed a means of removing the sand which they had put under the pool liner, and my husband volunteered Bowser for the job. The workmen were pleased and grateful. Bowser was gone now forever.

After that, we made a trip to the vacuum cleaner store. I insisted on getting an upright style that I could push from a standing position. The intention was good, but the vacuum was not. It was hard to get around the corners of furniture in our small house, and getting under the beds was virtually impossible. The "detail wands" that came with it were clumsy to use, plus the pieces tended to come off the unit when I extended them underneath and behind large objects. The job became a treasure hunt for the tools. Little pieces like the end brush used for upholstery and the thin nozzle used to go under the stove and refrigerator tended to slip off the wand and remain under the appliances. I ended up down on my stomach, using a yard stick to locate and push out the equipment and whatever it was supposed to remove. Typical discoveries were dog biscuits, lip balm, and my "worry carrots" that had dropped on the floor.

Frustration and broken belts led to the pursuit of another vacuum. This time I fell for an ad that showed precious Golden Retriever puppies bumbling around and making all kinds of mischief. They knocked over a plant which spilled the soil all over the rug. But the brand of vacuum advertised picked up the dirt and rescued the naughty puppies. It was irresistible! So we got one of those (vacuums, not puppies unfortunately) and set out on our quest for a clean house. For a while things were going well. Then the time came when nothing was being picked up. Replacing the bag didn't help. So we went on to ANOTHER vacuum: this one was a big-name brand that was absolutely going to work for us. And for a while it did, until a belt broke.

Desperation was beginning to set in when the commercial came on with a wife who "raced vacuums underground" and always won because while others were making pit stops, she kept going because her vacuum was BAGLESS! First of all, couldn't she find anything else to do? What about the dust/dirt that the thing picked up? It had to go SOMEWHERE. My husband bought into the ad, and the "bagless vacuum" came home. By now I was in a wheelchair and had to push levers to have it attain a reclining position (the vacuum, not the wheelchair). Pushing it around from a seated position, while trying to avoid becoming entangled in the cord, was tricky. The objectives of the cleaning were getting up cat litter, cat fur, dog kibble, pet toys, my long hair, and unwary stink bugs. The thing was really kind of neat to watch: as is went over stuff on the rug, that stuff accumulated in an empty(bagless) chamber on one side, and when that chamber was full a light came on to tell you to "empty it out". Since I was afraid of breaking something, I would appeal to my techie husband to do it. He then took it out to the garage and emptied it into a garbage can. The dust got all over, and I had to clean it out using a moist wipe. Finally, several weeks ago, I was doing the rug in the living room when I smelled smoke. The bagless wonder's belts were burning!

That was the last straw. The thing went out into the garage to sit alongside the Oriental failure, the big brand upright, the cute puppies vacuum, and now the bagless disaster. The house had a central vacuum which was impossible to use from a wheelchair. I have spent the past ten winters shoveling snow from my wheelchair, but trying to roll over the huge, fat hose was an impossible task. Now what should I do?

The solution came in an enormous box: another new vacuum! My husband had gone shopping, which in itself is dangerous, and selected a brand and model that he felt would allow me to use it from my chair. It was a canister style; the cord would retract automatically; it was already low down so that it reached easily under beds, couches, and tables. This seemed like the answer to our prayers. It came with a few bags, plus my husband had purchased an additional supply. There was a special attachment for removing pet hair/fur from furniture. It was ready to roll!